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Wednesday, 18 March 2009

Fuckin' Food

Today was the weigh-in for the weekly thing I do. I stayed the same from last week (FUCK!) so I'm paying my friend $1.00. This blows so much dick, it's ridiculous. Oh, and then, after fasting yesterday, I binged on fruit, graham crackers, and some fruit cookies. ROCK! That's fucked up. I'm going to be drinking way too much water today to wash this shit out.

Tuesday, 17 March 2009

I'm A Maniac

::SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH:: I'm starting to feel the exact same way I did before I started taking the Lexapro. I see my doctor next week, so hopefully we can up my dosage and shit. That's what I need.
It's St. Patrick's Day, so I'll be having a drink or two. I was going to get drunk off my ass, then thought about the calories, and I have to drop 1.5 lbs by tomorrow. Fuuuck.
I signed up for SugarDaddyForMe.com because I heard great things about it from people I know. I signed up and am getting all these messages from rich men! I should take their offers, but I'm nervous about it because, 1. I don't know these men, and 2. I can't take advantage and use people for their money.
But men are peices of shit and I hate them. So maybe they deserve it.
FUCK - I need more God damned meds.
Oh, and P.S. I got a $3.00 raise at work. That's good.

Thursday, 12 March 2009

Absolute Bordem

I can't help it. I get bored of shit very easily. To a fault, really. And I don't mean, like . . . in an ADD sort of way. I mean like, I always need to do something. Like I need to dye my hair, or I need to change the style (cut), or I need to buy a new car, or I need to change my name, or I need to change my attitude, or I need to change my apartment, or I need to change my furniture, or I need to change my E V E R Y T H I N G. It never ends. Never, ever, ever.
What does that say about me?

Tuesday, 10 March 2009

The Biggest Loser

So my job has this Biggest Loser Challenge they are doing. I wanted to sign up, but the supervisor in charge intimidated me out of entering. I said, "Is the winner based on how much percentage of weight that was lost, or the actual number of pounds?" She replied, "The actual number."
I passed her desk on the way home and she said, "Why'd you ask that question, Miss Lady?" I replied, "It's not fair!" She paused and looked at me dead in my eyes, "What's not fair? That you can walk into Charlotte Russe, or Forever 21, or Agaci and buy whatever you want?"
That sure as shit shut me the fuck up. I felt bad. But that didn't stop me from creating my OWN challenge with my friends. For every weekly weigh in, if I stay the same, I pay them a dollar. If I gain, I pay them $2.00 per pound gained.
So the challenge weigh-ins were sent to the floor, but people used aliases instead of their real names. I found out one of the participants weight and I knew her. She was TWENTY pounds more than me. I THOUGHT SHE WAS SMALLER THAN ME. When I pointed this out to friends, they yelled at me, saying, "DUH! YOU ARE ITTY BITTY! You're sick. Seriously, you are sick."
Y'all, I was trippin' so hard on this, I can't explain it to you. I didn't get it. I didn't understand at ALL how, if I was smaller than her, HOW THE FUCK did I not see it? I saw myself as bigger than her, but in reality . . . I'm not. I was so confused and scared and nervous and . . . I just didn't get it.
Weird-ass shit.